Cutting the fat - week 2

Week 2

Loss – 1.5 kg.

Yes, I am aware that this was a very long week.

Unfortunately due to a nasty case of the flu I was out of action for a few weeks, and I wanted to save the updates until after I’d managed a full week of being able to eat and exercise properly.

This is a good loss, but I’m not sure how my being sick factors in here.  My diet wasn’t perfect this week, but it was better, so who knows.  We’ll just have to see how I go next week.

Getting back into the exercise after such a break was also a challenge.  They say muscles have memory but that sure doesn’t seem to apply to me.  I’ve taken a few weeks off, and it’s like starting at square one again!  I couldn’t even do a single push-up.  It was like a terribly sad scene from the Biggest Loser, a fatty in her tights and singlet lying spent on the ground after doing half a sit up, with out the benefit of a super hot personal trainer yelling “C’mon Voyager, don’t be beaching yourself now!”

In this exercise routine I devised for myself I did allow for situations like this – somewhat – and I took them.  I really wanted to stick to it though; otherwise I’ll just keep doing less and less until I give up.  That I did – gave myself one day off this week, but otherwise I got through.  I had to take a lot of breaks, so it was slow going, but I feel better for it, and will try and go harder next week.

I’ll be aiming for another half kilo next week.  Can I do it?  Of course.  Will I do it?  Errr…

Well, keep thinking positive thoughts,

Voyager

Cutting the fat - step 1

Like I said last time, I'm trying to get fit.

The first step to getting my fabulous physique back?  A killer exercise regime.

It turns out that coming up with a workout schedule is a whole lot more fun that actually doing it, but whatever.

I’ve tried to come up with some exercises to target different parts of my body.  Apart from aesthetics, getting stronger, particularly in my core and lower body, would make life a lot easier.

Like many people on the spectrum I have issues developing and maintaining basic muscle tone.  Many gym exercises are damaging to me because I don’t have the strength to support myself so other parts of my body try to compensate.  If I’m going to do this, I’ve got to be informed.  I unearthed some of my old exercise sheets from my physio and have come up with the following for strengthening my back.

-          superman hold – 30 seconds

-          reverse leg raises – lie on stomach, lift one leg behind without moving hips, hold for 5 seconds, place back down.  Repeat 15 times on each side.

That’s the back.  Now, for the core…I don’t carry a lot of weight around my midsection so I consider it one of my best features.  It’s popped out a little of late, so even though it’s not really a problem area, it’s the one that’s got me the most freaked out.  My stomach muscles are hardier than my non existent back, so I’m tempted to do 500 crunches but that’s no good for my back.  But I will still be brutal.  Here is my proposed ab routine –

-          40 sit ups, fingers to knees

-          40 crunches

-          40 side crunches, 20 on each side

-          5 V ups (that’s all I can do – will be looking to increases that.)

-          Dish hold – 30 secs

-          50 dish rocks (optional, depending on how my back feels)

As for upper body – there's no benefit for me really – I just love toned arms!  My goals are to accomplish ONE pullup and chin up and to be able to do 40 ‘man’ pushups.  So far I can do about 15, but I’ll do as many as I can and make up the rest of the 40 with ‘girl’ pushups.  Then I can increase the number of ‘man’ pushups every few weeks.  A major concern also is what can only be described as my congenital lack of tricep muscles.  I’ll definitely be looking to develop those.

-          40 pushups

-          20 tricep pushups (on knees)

-          20 diamond pushups (on knees)

-          20 tricep dips

-          5 hand stands held as long as possible

-          2 30 sec tuck handstand hold on bed

So that’s it, my conditioning regime.  I’ll aim to do that 5 times a week. 

Cardio is going to be harder because my right knee is threatening to cave in.  This means no running, and biking is out as I don’t own one and I don’t have a gym membership.  I have however been learning how to skate recently, and as my physio technically didn’t say I couldn’t do that, I’ll settle for 3 practice skate sessions a week.

That’s the plan, anyway.  Time will tell if I stick with it, but I have a good feeling.

Happy travels,

Voyager

Cutting the fat

I, Voyager, am going to get fit.

There, I said it.  Now I can be held accountable by the power of teh interwebz.

I’ve mentioned before that I have weight issues, and how it causes me all manner of problems. Yet I’ve been struggling with it for over a year now, so what’s changed?  Why am I suddenly so driven to tighten up and what makes it different from all the other times I’ve vowed to lose weight?

It’s not just aesthetics.  Oh don’t get me wrong, I hate the way I look, but I always have.  When I was a teen doing dance and gymnastics I felt like an elephant even as I would strut around the gym in my shortie shorts and crop top.  I felt my early appearing breasts and shapely hips meant that I was overweight compared to the willowy, long waisted girls in my gym and dance classes.  I thought that these girls were healthier just because they appeared thinner.  Of course, this wasn’t true.  .As an insecure teenage girl I felt like any different body shape to mine was better.  Even so,  I was taking care of my self with my exercise and eating right.  And you know what I see now, looking back? 

My body when I am fit is, dare I say, nice. 

I have hips, a round butt and large breasts but now I know those things aren’t bad for you.  My comparatively tiny waist and flat tummy compliment them quite nicely.  Unfortunately, due to the layers of fat  I’ve laid down, I can’t appreciate my shape anymore.  I’m not getting the most out of my body, and that has to change.

Yes, this body of mine is a god given gift.  Looking fly would be awesome, but several things have been going on for me recently which have convinced me that I have to start treating this body like the gift it is.  I had an accident last month which resulted in a broken wrist, broken ankle and a concussion.  I was bed bound for awhile, and of course I couldn’t do any exercise at all.  Now that scared me.  I was already overweight, and now I can’t walk?  Dragging myself around was a real pain, and I couldn’t help wondering, when I started hobbling around again, if supporting my ample weight was slowing the healing process.  Luckily I didn’t really have a net weight gain – not walking meant I couldn’t visit the fridge whenever I felt like it!  As a result, my fitness is at floor level, and I’ve noticed the difference.  I need more to get me through the day.

My goal out of this is to lose 30 kilos.  It’s a lot – almost a whole person, but this is best case scenario.  If I lose 25, I’ll be at the upper end of the healthy weight range.  Anything between 20-30kg will have me feeling like my old slammin’ self again.  It’ll be a long hard journey but, as blogger handle suggests, I’m ok with pushing into difficult territory to reach my goals.

Thinking those strong, beautiful thoughts!

Voyager

Confession time: Why I deserve to be unhappy

Why is this?  I’m fat.

I don’t need a motorised scooter to get around or anything, hell I don’t need to go to plus sized clothing stores to make my clothes fit.  But I do take up space.  My lifestyle, dare I say, is all right.  I go to uni, I play sports, I go out dancing on a Friday night.  But according to many, larger women don’t deserve to have anything that makes them happy.

Oh, I wouldn’t go as far to say that I’m being denied employment or service at restaurants because I’m overweight.  It’s the little things that get to you.  Recently, my roommate posted this on his page.

Married Couples are Happier When Wives Thinner, study finds 

Now this in itself isn’t offensive or surprising to me.  What was offensive to me was how this study shat all over scientific methodology, but whatever.  I have been told, in no uncertain terms by several men that they don’t have time for rounder ladies.  I do forget how widespread this view is, but topics like this get people talking – and I realise just how prejudiced people around me are.

 

The first comment was from a pregnant friend, who wrote this:

“well, I’m screwed then!”

To which my room mate replied,

“Only for a few more months, Meg!”

Oh yes, don’t worry Meg.  See right now you are a horrid, squelchy, ugly being, using your pregnancy as an excuse.  You can make your husband pie every night, you can clean the house until it looks like the cover of Better Homes and Gardens, and you can wait on him hand and foot.  But could he be happy when he’s married to a fatty?  Never!  Don’t worry though– as soon as you pop that baby out, you can starve youself, ditch the baby body and go back to being the kind of wife you husband can take outside.

I made a comment too

“uh oh, I’m screwed long term!’’

To which my roommate replied –

“only cos you let yourself be :)”

ARRRGH!  THE CONDESCENDING SMILEY FACE OF DOOM!

Wow.  In one sentence, without even stating anything directly, my roommate has inferred everything that bothers me about my weight.  This would be my direct translation

“Oh Voyager, you so silly.  Not only are you repulsive to look at, but you’ve forgotten it’s your lazy, weak willed character it that got you there!”

And thus followed a delightfully immature facebook argument where I called him ignorant, and he called me lazy in less vague terms that got to the point where I nearly stormed into his bedroom, tipping his protein powder onto his bed and asking him why he dared make fun of my food issues when he lives on fake protein and amino acids.  Ah, but he’s not fat, therefore he’s an expert on healthy eating and successful relationships, no?  Being the ugly, weak, big mac inhaling fatass I am, I can’t help but preach the necessity of sensitivity and personality compatibility in relationships.  Silly Voyager indeed.

So to recap – why did I brain fart and get fat in the first place?  It’s a long story, but after my breakdown, they fed me a lot of Zyprexa. And sodium valproate. And many others.  I put on 5 kilos in my first week.  I gained 30 kilos in just three months.

My fuller figure is a battle scar because I was very, very ill.  I was out of control.  These drugs were a last resort to get me from a mess of a human being needing constant supervision to an independent law abiding citizen.  So, whenever one of you materialistic bitches that make up 99.8% of society thinks it’s funny to comment on my physique do you know what I hear?

“Well Voyager, you probably would be dead now if you didn’t take that drug.  But you did and look at you now – a big fat loser.  That’s so much worse!  You should have refused it – yeah, you would be dead, but you would have died thin and beautiful, and isn’t that what really matters?”

So it seems.  I’m not on the drugs anymore, and my energy levels have returned to normal.  I’ve been shifting the weight, slowly but surely.  It’s been hard though, funnily enough losing weight ain’t easy!  If only I could stop eating…it’s just that when all you hear are people telling you how repulsive the way you look is, eating a large triple cheeseburger meal might be the only good thing that happens to you all damn day.